On Molehills and Mountains

So...epic fail on my part for not writing for 2 weeks. P Claire definitely won out! And I'm going out of town with my Brazilian parents in like a half an hour, so let's see what I can crank out in that small window of time!

I had a rough transition back into my work at the Catholic Unversity and Arte e Vida. I think the word "meltdown" could be aptly applied. If you've even witnessed the process of me writing a research paper, it went a lot like that. If you haven't witnessed the process of me writing a research paper, consider yourself blessed--it's a frightful thing to behold! I was shifting between different housing situations when my classes began again, and I was really exhausted from not getting enough sleep for several nights in a row. Then, I held my brain out in front of me, glared at it in an attempt to establsh dominance, shook it, and said, "Be creative! Come up with PERFECT lesson plans--NOW! These kids need to be speaking English!" My brain didn't respond well to such threats. It took the passive-aggressive route and just stopped doing anything helpful. For example, I spent all of last Saturday trying to plan my next lesson for Arte e Vida and came up with absolutely nothing.

I would like to report, however, that at this time, my brain is once again performing at a satisfactory level (I gave it some cookies and apologized for loosing my cool). A number of wise Brazilian women have been advising me to relax. One of the administrators at Arte e Vida asked me the other day how I was doing. I told her I wanted to give up. She then spent about a half an hour telling me that all good teachers come up against challenges. She reminded me that my students are coming to me with a very limited academic background, that I could not expect to perform miracles in just two months. She also dropped the standard down comparatively about as deep as the Grand Canyon for what my goals and expectations should be for my classes. She said, "If they leave knowing one word, I'm thrilled. They're getting structure from coming to a super well-organized class, they're learning respect. You're already having an impact here by bringing peace into their lives and into our organization. They're going to remember you more than the content of your lessons." That was really encouraging. I like those priorities a lot more than my previous ones of trying to squeaze full sentences and viable pronunciation out of these kids. I've felt a lt more freedom in preparing my lessons since then. Another woman, the mother of the three-year-old mentioned in the previous post, told me an interesting Brazilian proverb the other night. She said, "Here we say 'The best is the enemy of the good.' If you're always trying to do the best, in the end what you do isn't good." I thought it funny that I've heard the exact opposite piece of wisdom in North American Christian circles--I know I've read it in my daily devotional at least a few times. Our corresponding proverb likewise pits what is best and what is good against one another, but with the opposite slant; I have heard it said that the good in life is what distracts us from the best. I think I'll decide to be both deep and vague and say that I agree with both proverbs depending on the situation.

Alas, I need to go! We are about to hit the road and visit some of my host parents' extended family in neighboring states for several days. There ought to be beaches involved (finally!!!) and I am intending to do my best to relax and leave my planning materials at home. Thank you for reading this. In less than a month I will be back on US soil!

Love,
Claire